Campus Zeros (Week 4)
I almost miss posting the Zeros more than the Heroes, which is shocking because normally I am such a positive and optimistic thinker... those of you that know me are now laughing uncontrollably. But, in Week 4 I saw plenty of gems that can make this list! Sadly Notre Dame losing is not something I can put on here or that there was a giant sinkhole that took down the entire Ohio State football program (oh well.) Now here are your Campus Zeros:
5. Clemson's second half defense: Somewhere in the second half the Tigers' D had flashbacks of their BCS bowl beat down that WVU handed them last year. This prompted them to huddle in a corner and shout NO BUENO as FSU racked up 35 points after going into into halftime DOWN to Clemson 21-14. The Seminoles totaled a whopping 667 total yards of offense and FSU QB EJ Manuel himself generated 482yds throwing and running the ball! Why wasn't he in the Campus Heroes this week? Because I hate Florida State. In short Clemson lost this prime time game 49-37.
4. Hawaii's Defense? I mean to call them a defensive unit is tough. Normally, defenses make tackles, force turnovers or at least vaguely get in the way off the opposing offense... but none of these things happened SO I am hard pressed to identify them as a D. Nevada dropped 575 total yards and 69 points on Hawaii. None of those stats are typos. While I am at it, where is that famous air-attack for the Warriors are known for? Colts Brennan and Timmy Chang somewhere (sure as hell not on an NFL roster) quietly weep.
3. Illinois ball handling skills: It would be on thing for me to criticize them if they got torched by Ohio State or Texas but this is not the case. They LOST L-O-S-T to(hold your breath) Louisiana Tech 52-24... I could stop there but it gets worse. The Illini turned the f%&$ ball over 6 times! SIX! You almost have to go out of your way to do that! Imagine in the huddle went something like: "I-Right 60 Power on 2. Coach said to the hand off sloppy and guys remember! Grip the ball like an arthritic 95 year old! Ok! Break!" 5 lost fumbles and 1 pick, unreal. Things can only go from really bad to WAY worse for this program as their next three games are home against Penn State and then they visit Wisconsin and Michigan. I bet they just can't wait.
2. Denard Robinson, Mich QB, SR: 13/24, 138yds, 4INT, 0TD. Okay BIG BLUE he ran for 90yds too but shoelaces or lace-less-Joe or Bobby-no-laces or whatever people call him sure as hell looked like a red shirt QB out there. Yes, the Fighting Irish in their shimmering gold helmets and white jerseys look a lot like Michigan's dark blue and yellow uniforms so lets give Robinson a break here... he is just another good athlete that can be a good college QB. There isn't any RG3 magic in this guy, hex, I would be shocked if he got taken before the 6th round next year IF someone takes him at all.
1. Arkansas Football Program: The Razorbacks should follow the lead of a local Arkansas high school football team, Lafayette County, and forfeit the rest of this season. They are just coming off a win where they let Rutger's Gary Nova toss 5TDs on them as they lost 26-17... but, that is just the start. They lost to Louisiana-Monroe earlier in the season and just keep finding ways to end up in the headlines for all the wrong reasons. It all started when Bobby Petrino was fired or he quit or whatever happened there. Then they hired Special Teams Coordinator (why would you ever do that) John L. Smith as HC... Smith recently admitted to being 25.7 million dollars in debt and all he has to say for the losses and the program's melt down is SMILE! If you haven't seen it... it is kind of creepy and sad... like a drunk and disorderly birthday clown: SMILE!
5. Clemson's second half defense: Somewhere in the second half the Tigers' D had flashbacks of their BCS bowl beat down that WVU handed them last year. This prompted them to huddle in a corner and shout NO BUENO as FSU racked up 35 points after going into into halftime DOWN to Clemson 21-14. The Seminoles totaled a whopping 667 total yards of offense and FSU QB EJ Manuel himself generated 482yds throwing and running the ball! Why wasn't he in the Campus Heroes this week? Because I hate Florida State. In short Clemson lost this prime time game 49-37.
4. Hawaii's Defense? I mean to call them a defensive unit is tough. Normally, defenses make tackles, force turnovers or at least vaguely get in the way off the opposing offense... but none of these things happened SO I am hard pressed to identify them as a D. Nevada dropped 575 total yards and 69 points on Hawaii. None of those stats are typos. While I am at it, where is that famous air-attack for the Warriors are known for? Colts Brennan and Timmy Chang somewhere (sure as hell not on an NFL roster) quietly weep.
3. Illinois ball handling skills: It would be on thing for me to criticize them if they got torched by Ohio State or Texas but this is not the case. They LOST L-O-S-T to(hold your breath) Louisiana Tech 52-24... I could stop there but it gets worse. The Illini turned the f%&$ ball over 6 times! SIX! You almost have to go out of your way to do that! Imagine in the huddle went something like: "I-Right 60 Power on 2. Coach said to the hand off sloppy and guys remember! Grip the ball like an arthritic 95 year old! Ok! Break!" 5 lost fumbles and 1 pick, unreal. Things can only go from really bad to WAY worse for this program as their next three games are home against Penn State and then they visit Wisconsin and Michigan. I bet they just can't wait.
2. Denard Robinson, Mich QB, SR: 13/24, 138yds, 4INT, 0TD. Okay BIG BLUE he ran for 90yds too but shoelaces or lace-less-Joe or Bobby-no-laces or whatever people call him sure as hell looked like a red shirt QB out there. Yes, the Fighting Irish in their shimmering gold helmets and white jerseys look a lot like Michigan's dark blue and yellow uniforms so lets give Robinson a break here... he is just another good athlete that can be a good college QB. There isn't any RG3 magic in this guy, hex, I would be shocked if he got taken before the 6th round next year IF someone takes him at all.
1. Arkansas Football Program: The Razorbacks should follow the lead of a local Arkansas high school football team, Lafayette County, and forfeit the rest of this season. They are just coming off a win where they let Rutger's Gary Nova toss 5TDs on them as they lost 26-17... but, that is just the start. They lost to Louisiana-Monroe earlier in the season and just keep finding ways to end up in the headlines for all the wrong reasons. It all started when Bobby Petrino was fired or he quit or whatever happened there. Then they hired Special Teams Coordinator (why would you ever do that) John L. Smith as HC... Smith recently admitted to being 25.7 million dollars in debt and all he has to say for the losses and the program's melt down is SMILE! If you haven't seen it... it is kind of creepy and sad... like a drunk and disorderly birthday clown: SMILE!
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